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Thursday, February 3, 2011

Jersey Shore Power Rankings Week 5: The. Grenade. Whistle.

Jersey Shore keeps topping themselves every week. The Grenade Whistle was an awesome way to keep the vuvuzalea relevant in our society. Honestly, I believe that every college across America should supply the male population with grenade whistles. We all need one.  In case you haven't been reading the power rankings, here are the categories.  



1.) Vinny: Last Week-2nd  Total Points Scored (121)
How He Scored: 14Q 12JA 3D -2RB
Overall Thoughts: Vinny is the mastermind behind the grenade whistle, and blew it when that gorilla was hanging around at the Shore house. I am disappointed in Vinny for going after the mob's boss' daughter. They didn't say she was a part of the mob, but one of her protectors was named 'Nicky Ducks', c'mon. Also he did fantastic work on putting up the stripper pole.



2.) Pauly D: LW-1st TPS (116
How He Scored: 9JA 8Q 3D
Overall Thoughts: I liked Pauly called JWoww's dogs, 'Snooki and Ryder', classic. He also did an artful job at dodging the grenade. He promoted the grenade whistle, instigated a couple things, and got a cabs are here line in the episode. Other than that? I really wasn't that impressed with his performance.

3.) The Situation: LW-3rd TPS (92)
How He Scored: 9JA 6Q 3D
Overall Thoughts: I thought that our writer Eric was the biggest instigator on the face of this world, but no that title belongs to Sitch. He loves starting drama like he is in middle school. The thing that puzzled me though, is when you have a women DTF in your bed, and instead you would rather help people out? This would not be the way I would go about things, but that's just me.

4.) Snooki: LW-4th TPS (77)
How She Scored: 7JA 3D
Overall Thoughts: Nothing really happened with Snooks this week. She just did her usual thing of getting drunk, and saying dumb shit. Other than that, she had no defining moments worth talking about.

5.) JWoww: LW-5th TPS (76)
How She Scored: 10JA 5S 3D 2OC
Overall Thoughts: I liked how JWoww said that Roger wasn't a rebound. That's a farce if I have ever heard one. I witnessed many friends find a girl/guy who finds a rebound, it happens to a lot of young people. Also JWoww and Sammi hugging it out at the end of the show compares to the Cold War ending in the late 80s. I never saw that one coming.

6.) Deena: LW-6th TPS (50)
How She Scored: 7JA 3D 2F
Overall Thoughts: At the end of the episode, there were questions about Deena's liking  to toss one's salad. Now, I do not know if that is true, but the way she got super defensive, might it be true?  That is one of those rumors you do not want going around about you.

7.) Ronnie: LW-7th TPS (40)
How He Scored: 8Q 8JA 3D 2F -6C
Overall Thoughts: A strong performance from Ronnie this week. I loved that he just started throwing Sam's stuff all over the room and then laughed like an evil genius when she asked him about it. But man, the roids must have got to him with all the crying he did this episode. Ronnie is in that special class of men who just love to cry.

8.) Sammi: LW-8th TPS (-1)
How She Scored: 7F 6JA 6D -3BAN -3C
Overall Thoughts: Yes I did give Sam a bunch of positive points. First, there aren't a lot of women who would just fire on their boyfriend like she did. My goodness they are crazier than Ike and Tina.  It was very interesting to see her change overnight, we will see if she keeps it up.

-Charlie.